Friday, November 30, 2012

What Do Today's Teens Think About Marriage?

The results are in!  "Survey says..."

According the the University of Virginia, the future of society's norms can be predicted in their recent large scale report titled "The State of Our Unions".   OH!  She said the word 'report'!  No worries, you don't have to be a college research professor to see the trends of the last several decades as they are revealed by topic, charts and easy to see graphs. I like pictures!

You could get lost all day in fascinating thoughts about the importance of sex, generosity and commitment in successful marriages.  That is what we're all about in our marriage ministry The Dance of Marriage.

But what caught my attention today was the section about our teenagers. Where have they landed on the topics of marriage with what they have seen from the previous generations?  What do they think about living together, babies before or without marriage, the chances of a happy life-time union? 

Find out here TEEN ATTITUDES ABOUT MARRIAGE AND FAMILY   Then come back and contribute your personal comments and reaction!  I love to interact with other parents who are willing to be candid in their wondering and learning. 

Personally, I was shocked at the relief I felt looking at the stats! It's not as bad as I thought in many arenas. I'm more hopeful that having our teenagers watch our marriage 'real time' is a GOOD thing; all of it... the heated discussions, the conflict resolutions, the tears and the laughter, the good years and the hard years, the kissing in the kitchen and the Sunday afternoon 'naps'!

I pray that they see enough of the 'work' of a great marriage to not be disenchanted when they discover for themselves at the 'seven year itch' mark that marriage is NOT about your spouse making you 'happy'. It's about two people laying down their selfish nature of ME to build a new entity called 'WE'. 

I pray that they witness enough of the JOY and fruit of a great marriage to provide the hope and conviction in their hearts to commit to the 'work' of the planting season to get to the harvest of the DEEP intimacy that the world so desperately runs around trying to find with short cuts and false guarantees.

Today, I will not hide our very authentic, very transparent, very NORMAL relationship ups, downs, woes and JOYS from my children.  According to the facts in this report, our culture's lack or failures in the marriage and family department have not swayed our teenagers (too far) from the HOPES and DREAMS they have for a satisfying and successful family life.