What Do Today's Teens Think About Marriage?

The results are in!  "Survey says..."

According the the University of Virginia, the future of society's norms can be predicted in their recent large scale report titled "The State of Our Unions".   OH!  She said the word 'report'!  No worries, you don't have to be a college research professor to see the trends of the last several decades as they are revealed by topic, charts and easy to see graphs. I like pictures!

You could get lost all day in fascinating thoughts about the importance of sex, generosity and commitment in successful marriages.  That is what we're all about in our marriage ministry The Dance of Marriage.

But what caught my attention today was the section about our teenagers. Where have they landed on the topics of marriage with what they have seen from the previous generations?  What do they think about living together, babies before or without marriage, the chances of a happy life-time union? 

Find out here TEEN ATTITUDES ABOUT MARRIAGE AND FAMILY   Then come back and contribute your personal comments and reaction!  I love to interact with other parents who are willing to be candid in their wondering and learning. 

Personally, I was shocked at the relief I felt looking at the stats! It's not as bad as I thought in many arenas. I'm more hopeful that having our teenagers watch our marriage 'real time' is a GOOD thing; all of it... the heated discussions, the conflict resolutions, the tears and the laughter, the good years and the hard years, the kissing in the kitchen and the Sunday afternoon 'naps'!

I pray that they see enough of the 'work' of a great marriage to not be disenchanted when they discover for themselves at the 'seven year itch' mark that marriage is NOT about your spouse making you 'happy'. It's about two people laying down their selfish nature of ME to build a new entity called 'WE'. 

I pray that they witness enough of the JOY and fruit of a great marriage to provide the hope and conviction in their hearts to commit to the 'work' of the planting season to get to the harvest of the DEEP intimacy that the world so desperately runs around trying to find with short cuts and false guarantees.

Today, I will not hide our very authentic, very transparent, very NORMAL relationship ups, downs, woes and JOYS from my children.  According to the facts in this report, our culture's lack or failures in the marriage and family department have not swayed our teenagers (too far) from the HOPES and DREAMS they have for a satisfying and successful family life. 
TAKE HEART!

Tango on the High Seas?

What could be more romantic than to waltz under the starlight on the deck of a cruise ship? Or maybe dancing a late night Tango in a dimly lit nightclub is more your style. Others may think moving to the rhythms of merengue and salsa music at a beach party sounds more like them. It really doesn’t matter because it all sounds like fun doesn’t it? Well then run, don’t walk, or simply surf on over to http://www.lovelikeyoumeanitcruise.com/ and join us and an unbelievable line up of presenters and performers for a fabulous 5-day cruise for Valentine’s Day 2011.
FamilyLife & Premier Christian Cruises have partnered to bring you the first ever fully chartered Christian marriage cruise. The hosts for this memorable event are Dennis & Barbara Rainey. The list of other remarkable presenters and entertainers is too long to list here. Simply click on the link above to explore the possibilities!
The Palmer’s will be bringing their unique combination of dance instruction and marriage enrichment to the party as well. What could be more fun than holding your one and only in your arms as you learn a step or two at one of Stuart and Tracy’s enlightening and entertaining dance sessions? The Palmer’s guarantee a pain free experience that is “better than therapy and much less expensive”, according to one of their student couples!
You won’t want to miss this opportunity to invest in each other and Love Like You Mean It!
We’ll see you on the dance floor and at the beach!

Marriage is like a home improvement project that lasts forever!

Isn’t funny how our ‘feelings’ cycle for our spouses?
I can say that in 18 years of marriage, the ‘in love thing’ comes back around again and again, only DEEPER! I am so visually oriented that I see and understand everything with a picture. So my picture of our marriage growth is like a small old house that we have spent 18 years restoring, remodeling, adding onto rooms, beautifying the floors and woodwork, adding a master bedroom suite, adding a sun porch… you get the picture! Year by year, we work faithfully. It seems that the ‘new projects’ are never DONE, but we enjoy each step that is completed – each new room or beautiful color to live in and appreciate.

Sometimes the sheer WORK of it is overwhelming. Like when you look at a new project where three layers of wall paper need to be stripped and the walls re-plastered and smoothed from scratch. You sometimes want to run away from what you know will be a challenge, a choice to work ON PURPOSE for a season and “it won’t be pretty”! But the end result is so amazing!

Of course, you have to keep going back to the designer for instructions…daily, sometimes hourly! He has the big picture of what it will look like in the future, what purposes He has for each room and the masterful, creative skill to blow you away with the outcome.

To sum it up - every year that we INVEST only serves to make the marriage (house) more valuable! In times of flagging ‘feelings’ we say to ourselves, “We’ve got too much into this to ever leave it or give up!”